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I’m Not Sad, I Swear

March 27, 2007

It's official:  Everyone I know is pregnant.

Well, maybe not everyone. 

But this, reading my high school barkada's blog that she's 8 months pregnant with her second child after months of not hearing from her, another high school batchmate blissfully recalling her first pregnancy while in the throes of her second as well, and finally, insanely beautiful pregnant pictures of another high school classmate splashed all over her just put up Multiply site (and yes, it's her second too). 

It's when a girl of 6 climbs up to me, asking to be carried, and her mom half jokingly says (and the others chime in):  D, don't do that.  You're too heavy for Tita J.  Mataktak nya ang iyang uterus.  It's when I know they're all rooting for me, and at the same time, worried for me.

I am not usually jealous.  And I still do have ambivalent feelings about being a mom sometimes.  But there are times, oh yes, there are times when I just want to hold a baby's face to mine and smell its sweet baby breath.

I don't know where this comes from, as all I've been watching are magician movies (The Illusionist and The Prestige). And all I've been dreaming about in my sleep are cat murders.

 

Posted by theicequeen at 3:00 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

i am so happy you’re back as good habits die hard!

i am glad you’re not sad… it just shows that you have not given up on your “baby project”. i’m one of those rooting for you. for the mean time, hold “the hub’s” face close to yours…smell his sweet breath…’til your little angel comes.

Posted by charm at March 27, 2007, 10:53 pm

i am praying you’ll have your little miracle soon =D

Posted by T at March 28, 2007, 2:07 pm

someday jopay you’ll have your little angel.. in God’s perfect time.. and when that happens know that I’ll be one of the many who will be celebrating..

Posted by Dr. Meredith at March 28, 2007, 11:08 pm

If it is for you to have kids it will come til then enjoy being a wife and each other’s company.

Enjoy being newlyweds everyday for when kids comes into the picture everything will change.

Posted by C at March 29, 2007, 12:13 am

I so know the feelings jops…but our time will come. Keep the faith, girl, you are not alone.

Posted by Madie at March 30, 2007, 1:08 am

Hi jops, my wife and i had to deal with a blighted ovum during her first pregnancy after waiting for some time. It was so sad and very disappointing in a way. I was glad though my wife was strong enough to go through it all. I was very much worried about it.
After that painful episode, we had second thoughts about trying again. After a little over a year shes pregnant again. We didnt expect it to happen. She’s 4 months pregnant now and we pray that everything will be fine.

What im trying to say is taht sometimes we’ll just have to leave it to God or some divine providence who we believe has ultimate control over all of us.

Posted by siu at April 5, 2007, 11:28 am

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get to know the WOMAN

would-be lawyer turned homemaker. (day)dreamer. cloud watcher. moon lover. hankers for a life that's bursting at the seams with books and wine and art. believes she can only get better with age -- and swears by it on her three-inch heels.

got clicked!

drop me a line

jundics:

Hi jopie,
murag serious kaay kas imung new entries da! Take it easy….and tnx for sharing, i wouldnt have known such sensitivities….cheers to blogging!

himantayon:

agi agi lang :) ..

kat:

jops, i can’t open my personal mail here. :( but u can email me at aconsola@lexmark.com. :)

theicequeen:

hi isay! i’m fine… a li’l bit stressed out but fine. congrats diay oi! yehey! graduate na ka before you know it! so happy for you! :-)

theicequeen:

kaith, i sent you email. :-)

isay:

hoppin’..musta naka jopay??

Kat:

jops, are u going home here in cebu?? :)

tiris:

haha ka tag-an ko! haha! anyway, missya where have u been? abi ko niuli na ka. tawgi nya ko or tawgan tikaw hehe kutob kinsa kauna =P

theicequeen:

sus kaith, sugot jud ko! kana kung mo-salig ka nako. hehehe. baby-sitting newbie baya kaayo ko. ;-)

theicequeen:

bilib gyud ko nimo, tiris! hehehe. *wink wink*

Kat:

hi jops! sus, kung silingan lang unta ta no, i could leave raf with u. but then, he’s no angel. haha.

tiris:

jops, mao ni sya kadtong magpa drive nimo? hehehe!

theicequeen:

small world, mai noh, matud pang tiris. ;-)

mai:

i.hi ko ni ngoy (inger) and mike (luke)…

theicequeen:

aw, kung magkita mi’g balik, tiris. *assuming* hehehe. bitaw oi, they seemed like a really nice couple.

tiris:

how small the world gets. inger was my classmate in UP hehehe! super shy. how are they? send my regards if kaila pa sya hehe *uwaw*

theicequeen:

tiris, i never liked taylor hicks, right from the start. that whole soul patrol thing was just silly. no offense to his fans. katherine was the whole package. and i think she’s making the rounds of hollywood already.

theicequeen:

hi ‘ris! can’t wait to see your boracay pics! :-)

tiris:

jops, sakto ka about american idol. as in! ive always thought jasmine trias would look more like a pop star. and so does katherine mcphee!

Iris:

Nice to see the Ice Queen back! Now my reading repertoire is complete once again. :-D

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